Wall Notes

Writing, thoughts, ramblings, and what makes me laugh


If you’ve ever wondered if Inspector Gadget had a secret love-child with Rosie the Robot and if that baby was dropped on its head everyday for 20 years while teaching it to smoke….then today is your day!!! Get ready for a big ole curiosity sandwich filled with wonder and awesome!

Here is the first in my series of Crappy Trapper Keeper Art. In case you’re new just click on the link for all the info.

This is the earliest of the bunch. Circa: 1989. Tim Burton’s Batman came out that summer. My oldest brother graduated from high school. It was a good year…until I picked up a pencil.

I have no title for this one. I will simply call it “HILLO” (pronounced Hi-Low). Bask in my child prodiginess.

This begins a series of android-esque people. Some reoccurring themes to take note of:

1. No feet or legs.

2. Some sort of hat or head apparatus.

3. Really terrible drawings created by a monkey with no hands or feet.

Here are some of my thoughts and reflections…

For some odd reason I always started drawing people at the waist. This clever technique always left them with giant abnormal feet and legs and heads smaller than sewer rat (yet again another TMNT reference).

Enjoy and feel free to point out your favorite observations.


December 9, 2010 Posted by | Art, Drawing | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Trapper Keeper

Hey friends,

Let’s face it, I stink at updating blog posts. I’ve tried to make this a priority but family, job, fiction writing, and art takes my time. So no more apologies or promises of great stories. But the question still remains…What to do about the blog? I could give it up or let it fall into internet limbo. I could use it as a conversation starter: “Hey, I have blog which means I’m awesome.” I could also put random song lyrics to express my Emo and deeply buried angst, but that’s what MySpace is for. My dilemma: What can I put on a blog that requires the least amount of work yet is still interesting and funny?

Cue Trapper Keeper:

Trapper Keeper is pretty awesome, I know. I decorated it with stickers from my high school football team. Don’t hate on the style.

I walked in my office at home, cleaning it as per my promise to my lovely wife, and in a stack of my old art projects lay Trapper Keeper. Now Trapper Keeper is old school. I’m talking when Trapper Keepers had the capability of being the equivalent to a portable Fort Knox. Multiple plastic zip pockets. Cool folders of Cats surfing in Hawaii. Covered in beautiful mountain ranges that would make Lee Greenwood cry a river with Justin Timberlake. Epic before epic was conceived.

Now in Trapper Keeper I kept my drawings. Not just any drawings but creations 20 years old. I opened Trapper Keeper and low and behold before my eyes lay the worst possible crap that anyone could create. Drawings literally that could be confused with the work of a blind, no-armed, serial killer with turrets. Gazing upon these pages of garbage it hit me…Why not share these with the world??? There is a years worth of material here!

Look at that! If paper had tear ducts, it would be weeping for euthanasia!

Now this is something I don’t think I could have handled ten years ago. Now, I think it’s hilarious. My professional desires have always circled the creative (specifically art and writing). I have been blessed to design and sell t-shirts, posters, websites, marketing identities, illustrate children’s books, paint wall murals and personalized canvas paintings. I’ve even had ideas and completed works for a multi-million dollar company stolen and others take the credit. But why focus on the things that I’m proud of and take talent?? It’s time to shine the spotlight on trash that will make a toddler cry.

Each week I will post a dynamic piece of toilet paper that I created as a kid with my commentary on what makes it original and completely horrifying. I will post drawings from Mortified the Trapper Keeper starting from the year 1989! Feel free to jump into the mix with your own observations and insight.

As you can see, the football theme grew to the backside of the Book of Shame. There’s also a Batman band-aid stuck below the bottom middle football helmet. Don’t ask, because I don’t remember why.

December 8, 2010 Posted by | Art, Books, Drawing, Writing | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments